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I have to move house and lose all my money !  My bloody bogans of neighbours keep abusing me and last week either wednesday night or thursday, that fuck head next door slashed Ian's tyre on his car!!!!  Not happy, now Ian can't stay over so I'm like practically living at his place which is weird, cos now what's the point in paying rent for a place I literally cannot live in.  I spoke to my landlord and she's like 'There's nothing we can do"!  But for fuck sakes that is why I had to leave Richie in the first place and move out on my own to get away from bogans, and abusive people but now I'm getting verbally abused 24/7!  So i can either live in fear, or move out and live in the gutter pretty much!  Cos guess what? I don't have a spare $1000 to move!!!  I don't even have savings thanks to fucking richie leaving me in debt!  I did not need this..........  And I'm at my wits ends on what to do.  Ian doesn't understand anything I'm going through right now so I'm like not even talking much.................................  i don't know what to do...........
Oh and mum's response was 'Your problem, not mine'!!!  and then everyone complains that their parents are too much like parents! Ha you should think yourself fucking lucky!!!  At least you have parents that love you, some of us don't even have that.

I need help.  I feel all alone.  Any CONSTRUCTIVE advice is welcome........... 
<p align="center"><img src="http://www.flarn.com/~warlock/tarot/winged/18.jpg"></p>
<h2 align="center"><font face="Verdana"><b>You are The Moon</b></font></h2>
<p align="center"><font face="Verdana">Hope, expectation, Bright promises.</font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="Verdana">The Moon is a card of magic and mystery - when prominent you know that nothing is as it seems, particularly when it concerns relationships. All logic is thrown out the window.</font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="Verdana">The Moon is all about visions and illusions, madness, genius and poetry. This is a card that has to do with sleep, and so with both dreams and nightmares. It is a scary card in that it warns that there might be hidden enemies, tricks and falsehoods. But it should also be remembered that this is a card of great creativity, of powerful magic, primal feelings and intuition. You may be going through a time of emotional and mental trial; if you&nbsp;have any past mental problems, you must be vigilant in taking your medication but avoid drugs or alcohol, as abuse of either will cause them irreparable damage. This time however, can also result in great creativity, psychic powers, visions and insight. You can and should trust your intuition.</font></p>
<p align="center"><font size="2" face="Verdana"><b>What Tarot Card are You?</b><br><a href="http://www.flarn.com/~warlock/tarot" target="_blank">Take the Test to Find Out.</a></font></p>

Fuckin Friday! Fuck yeah

Hurry up 5.10!!!!  Drinks at hadleys on behalf of work!!  Yay can't wait!!!

Heading out tomorrow night to Irish with the girls from work, can't wait!!!  Finally a conversation that doesn't entale 'When i was off my guts!'!!!!   Really looking forward to it.

Havn't updated in a few days as I've been really sick and off work............due to stress and being run down and also coming down with the flu............!!  Yuk!!!

Bloody Gita is trying to become a model and has made a website and needs votes apparently well so Johnsie tells me and Johnsie voted on behalf of me when I'm not even  ffriends with Gita.  I think Gita needs to wake up and realise what Aaron is doing to her!  Poor Girl.....

My boss wants to borrow my Friends Box set to burn them all!!!  How funny.................

I bought Ian part of his xmas pressie today............ i hope he likes it!!!

Well that was a boring entry! Oh well story of my life

What classifys a TRUE friend?

I am feeling sooooo sad and sooo lonely at the moment, friend wise I mean.  I feel like I have no friends that want to make the effort.  All I do is call them but will they bloody call me or msg me? No.... cos that would dip into their drug money!!  Well fuck them...............  They can get stuffed......  I'm sick of it.

I'm going out on saturday night with Laura from work and I'm going to have awesome fun.....  Screw the druggies!

Shitty Weather = Shitty Lunch Time

What is wrong with the bloody weather down here!!!! It was like sunny and warm well sort of this morning, now there are dark clouds and looks like it's about to piss down!!! I hate this place............

Ian and i were yet having another D and M again last night, this time about our trip to Europe at the end of next year. We can't wait, the subject came up again as my friend at work, Renee and her husband, Craig (who is my director) are travelling around the world, they leave at the end of this month, they are spending xmas in new york! I'm soo jealous, going to Hollywood, Hong Kong, France, Italy, Hawaii....... Ahhhhhh..... Anyway Ian was saying when my lease runs out in my flat next year that I should move in with him at his house with his parents but I'm like yes and no....... It's like it would be awesome if I didn't do what I do at night.... LoL We'll probably still end up living with his folks, we'll just work it out but I can tell you know there is no way I'll be living in his room, it's like a bloody dog box, I fall over all the time,! It's like for fuck sakes, chuck some shite out!!!! Yeah I knwo I'm just being a girl. Colin's room is huge, I hope we can have his!!! I think Colin may have got the message that he has no right to walk all over Ian.! Finally only took him a month!

I am soooo annoyed at someone that keeps commening on my journal but of course this person is a gutless fuck witt who won't even show there name and I'm not the only journal they are doing it too.  x_lindsayw_x      is also having the same problem!  All I can say is, ahhh gee some people have too much time on their hands with jealousy and obsessing about people they want to become!  Whoever you are, you are the most pathetic person in the world of LJ! I stayed at Ian's last night and sometimes it's sooo annoying, i mean their bathroom is absoute mess, I can't sit my toothbrush even on the sink or anything and yes I know they are renovating but seriously who the hell lives like that?!  I know I've been brought up differently and I'm very pedantic about a lot of things but seriously it's just cleanliness.... Might have something to do with the bloody rabbit and guinea pig inside!!!   How did they cope when they all lived at home in that tiny bathroom???  I guess we all make do with what we have, out all people I should know that, granted where I'm living.......



Ha, story of my life! LoL. Havn't updated as I havn't been at work till now cos of my stupid arm and been off on workers comp. I had a pretty good weekend, on friday night Ian took me down to Salamanca and we walked round and he bought me lush ice cream, then on saturday night I was meant to be going out for Tamika's birthday. I went round to Ash's, there were like 20 odd people there all talking bout drugs and no one thinks that there is more to life..... I can't stand it anymore. I got sooo pissed off that I went home at midnight and didn't go out, I serioulsy feel like I have no true friends at all. No kidding. I feel like the only person who even remotley wants to hang out with me and have a conversastion with me is Ian.

Lindsay messaged me the other night seeing if Ian and I want to go and have a session and I hardcore do want to go round etc but everytime I mention it, he goes all funny and is like 'You can. I'm not'. Might have to go and visit Lindsay wif Johnsie and somehow get Robbie to come so we can get there..........LoL.... Life is sooo complicated for things sooo simple sometimes.... I don't think Ian understands that I don't have really a proper best friend at the moment. Like yeah I have Rob etc.... I miss having chick friends....... I miss my crew and the fact that I'm invisable.......


I wish Ian would open up to me more, he always half tells me things then just dead stops......it's frustrating. And he knows all about my past and my exs.....but will he offer information? No..... oh well.... that's just Ian I've gathered or maybe he really doesn't love me enough to confide in.....

My arm is still killing........Had an xray.....I'm going home...........


my arm my arm

can't type much, done something to my arm at work carrying a box and now need x ray................... ah ah my arm my arm.

I need Ian


I hate hospitals

And I didn't realize how much until last night. Ian and I went to the hospital to go see his dad as his dad had surgery etc..... I was right while we were talking to his dad in his room but once we left, the walls started caving in and everything went blury and I hardcore got chest pains, Ian was literally holding me up, it felt like I was in a nightmare or something, like Ian was talking to me but I could hardly hear him, it was freaky!

Keiran and Ian's dad, Gary were talking bout Bianca and asked me what I thought of her, I said 'No comment' and then Keiran is like 'Be nice or you can't come to xmas', I don't think Ian's family realize I don't actually care bout things like that.........grain of salt and I think Keiran was very surprised..... Keiran gave me her old lap top which is wicked, it's a bit slow but my boss at work is going to fix it for me! Can't complain it has windows xp and everything.! I didn't even ask for it, one night I was just saying to Ian how I have no time to do my study and it sux not have a computer and then a week later I get given a lap top! How nice.... I love Ian's family sooo much...

I've been missing Ian soo much this week and Ian surprised me last night by bringing all his work stuff so he could spend the night with me, it was sooo cute so I snuggled up to Ian all night, well till 4.15am till he had to get up and go to work! I love Ian with all my heart, he makes me soooo happy. Ian Ian Ian.....

Now for all your LJ users out there who are abusing my journal and one of my good friend's .......! I have had the same problem and all I'm going to say is, what is wrong with you? These are peoples private thoughts and feelings! If you have nothing constructive to say, say nothing.!!!



Top 5 Movies and Music for me!


1. One Perfect Day

2. A Walk to Remember

3. How to Lost a Guy in 10 Days

4. Raise Your Voice

5. Wolf Creek


1. John Course

2. Bexta

3. Nik Fish

4. Goodwill

5. Amber Savage